The John Edwards revelation that he, in fact, had an extramarital affair with campaign videographer Rielle Hunter in 2006 is in some ways a very private matter. As a journalist, I've never been convinced that we should be covering the private lives of people in the public eye. But here's the catch— John Edwards, when he was a Presidential candidate, made his marriage a very big issue. His wife Elizabeth is an extraordinary woman who is suffering from a terrible form of cancer. Her prognosis is not good. When her diagnosis was made public, John Edwards continued his Presidential campaign and Elizabeth was a very big part of it. In many ways, she was much more popular than he ever was.

During the campaign, Senator Edwards talked in a very public way about his wife. He talked in detail about their marriage and about their commitment to each other. Obviously, even the best marriages have problems, and if everyone who ever cheated in their marriage were barred from running for public office, there would be very few candidates left.

But the problem for John Edwards is that last October he was confronted by the media about allegations that he was having an affair with a woman who was hired to produce videos for his campaign. Edwards opted to emphatically deny the allegations. He said they were "completely false." He later attacked the National Enquirer who was pushing the story, calling it "tabloid trash." Edwards went on the offensive and he ridiculed the source and the credibility of the story. But when you run for President of the United States, the standards for your conduct— both public and private— are a lot higher than for other people.

Those rules aren't going to change anytime soon. It wasn't John Edwards' affair that destroyed him, it was how he handled the issue. It was how he seemingly took advantage of his wife's health situation to gain public sympathy. I'm not saying it was his intent, but that's how it looked to many, including this observer. Once he did that, John Edwards had to know this was going to become public. He hired Rielle Hunter. In fact, he hired her for a job in which she was hardly qualified. He then tried to keep her quiet and by some amazing coincidence, Hunter was being paid what seemed like hush money by John Edwards' former campaign finance chairman Fred Baron. Edwards had to know that this would all come out. And worst of all, when Edwards got confronted at nearly 3 o'clock in the morning in a hotel lobby by the National Enquirer and was asked if he was in the room of Hunter and her new baby girl, John Edwards ran into the hotel bathroom and stayed there until security could get him out.

Sex sells, and political scandals involving sex are a lot more interesting to many than healthcare policy, prospects for peace in the Middle East, and how to get out of this economic recession. For many, the Edwards affair provides great fodder for jokes, wise cracks as well as another excuse to blast all politicians as hypocrites and creeps. Clearly, John Edwards had terrible judgment. Yet, who among us hasn't made terrible mistakes? The difference is that when you run for President, those mistakes are very likely to become public, especially in this 24/7 internet- dominated media environment, more is made public than ever before.

Again, John Edwards knew all this, but still decided to run for President, and still put his very sick wife in a public position. Therefore, he alone is responsible for this scandal. However, beyond the political intrigue, we must all remember that the people hurt the most by this are not politicians, journalists, or even voters. It's the Edwards' family, particularly Elizabeth Edwards, who did nothing to deserve any of this. In the end, politicians are still human beings, and their families often suffer.

Finally, if John Edwards really wanted to be President, he should have told his wife of his affair immediately and candidly disclosed the affair to campaign workers, the media, and the public at large. The only other choice was to say it was a "private matter", not for public consumption. He chose to do neither, opting to attack the messenger. That strategy never works, whether it's in Presidential politics or in everyday lives.

Write to Steve Adubato with your feedback at SAdubato@aol.com